Etiquette

 We had a book, written by Amy Vanderbilt.

Amy Vanderbilt's Complete Guide to Etiquette.

Our father used to read out loud to us, from the book. We all laughed, including dad. And we learned nothing about etiquette.

That's my dad.

Fist fights were a regular occurrence in my childhood home. One time, my brother had me by my shirt collar, repeatedly punching me in the face. He was a lot bigger than me, and I couldn't get away. Our father walked into the kitchen, saw James punching me in the face (my face was already bloody), and said, "What are you doing?? Put up your hands! Block him!"

He didn't stop my brother from hitting me, but he did yell at me for not protecting myself.

hair

I have literally never combed my hair. Last week, a nurse did it for me. First, she handed me a comb, and I looked at it, then asked her, "What am I supposed to do with this?"

She took it from me, and combed my hair. She made me look like a young King Charles.